Goodbye
by Weasley.is.my.king204
Summary: Sirius has escaped from Azkban, and from the dementors at Hogwarts.  Harry finally knows the truth, but there is one more thing that Sirius wants to do now that he is finally free.


So, my finals are coming up, and I'm inevitably going to be swamped studying and what not, so I figured I'd write this tonight. I had a great day decorating the tree, and I'm going to end it nicely with a one shot.

I've had this idea for a while, so I finally decided to sit down and write it. I hope you enjoy! :]

_**Goodbye**_

He glanced up at the sign. It looked exactly the same as it had the last time he had been there. It was so strange that so many things could change, but that tiny little thing would stay the same. He remembered coming for the first time, cursing James as he wound his way through the little town. All the bloody streets looked the same, and James hadn't mentioned there were muggles about too. He nearly got caught twice.

He remembered the last time he came past this sign. He was headed to James and Lily's house for dinner, his baby godson, Harry, only a few weeks old. He smiled as he passed the sign, thinking about the first time he saw his godson, and how many more times he thought he would walk down the street to see him—birthdays, holidays, and maybe one day he'd have his own children to bring. He had had no idea that that evening would be the last he spent with his friends, any of them. Lily had spent all day cooking a huge meal, she gotten James to clean, and Remus had shown up with a huge bottle of fire whiskey. Harry slept in his basinet across from the table for most of the evening, and the four of them laughed and talked until the wee hours of the morning. He had no clue that soon James, Lily, and Harry would go into hiding.

He took a deep breath as he looked at the small grave yard next to the church. He knew they had to be there. Lily always talked about how much she loved that little church, she and James had planned to spend their entire lives in Godric's Hallow. He knew there was no place that the two of them would rather have been taken.

He noticed a war memorial near the graveyard, a list of names carved into stone, but he was unfamiliar with muggle wars. As he inched closer, he pulled his cloak tightly around his face. The night air was chilly, despite's it's being spring and he couldn't risk anyone seeing him. He'd spent twelve years in Azkaban, he wasn't going back, especially now because Harry needed him.

As he approached the war memorial, on his way into the small graveyard, he noticed out of the corner of his eye that something seemed to change. He froze, preparing for the worst—someone was watching and recognized him. He was relieved to know that the statue had just changed its form; it must change when a wizard walked by it. As his eyes glazed over the statue, he suddenly realized what the memorial had become. His eyes laced with tears as he looked at the new stone form in front of him—a huge statue of a man, a woman, and a baby. He tried to suppress tears as he looked at his best friend's family, what a beautiful family it was. It was a family that James, Lily, and Harry deserved, and it had all been stolen from them, and he was the one being blamed.

Sirius turned away from the statue and continued to move to the graveyard. He was consumed with anger as he thought of Peter. Sirius would have gladly gone to Azkaban for killing Peter. It destroyed him to know that everyone, including up until recently, his best friend, Remus, thought he sold out Lily and James. He would never betray his friends. James was like his brother. Sirius would have died before giving them to Voldemort.

Despite the fact that he had not been the one to hand them over the Voldemort, Sirius still felt guilty. He had been the one to convince Lily and James to make Peter secret keeper. Sirius knew everyone would think that he was, he was James's best friend. Everyone would assume, he would never say otherwise, and if anything happened to him Lily and James would still be safe. Then Peter betrayed them all. He gave them up to Voldemort, and Sirius had given him that chance.

Sirius knew that time had come and gone, Lily and James were never coming back and he could never change that. He had the chance though, the chance to make things right, and to punish Peter for what he did, but he hadn't. Harry had stopped them, Sirius and Remus. Harry had his mother's kind disposition and merciful nature, and he knew what James would want for his friends. Sirius hadn't killed Peter because Harry wanted it that way, and Sirius owed it to him for being gone for so long, but Sirius still regretted that decision.

Sirius reached the entryway of the small graveyard. There moon was almost full, lacing the graves with light. Sirius began walking down the aisles of graves, glancing at each one looking for his friends'. He came across a few families that he knew, like the Dumbledore's, and some others he was sure he heard somewhere.

Finally Sirius found the headstone for which he had been searching. Although he knew he'd find it, he wasn't quite prepared for the tightening in his chest as he knelt in front of it. He looked solemnly, numbly, at the headstone that bore his best friends' names.

_James Potter Lily Potter_

_Born 27 March 1960 Born 30 January 1960_

_Died 31 October 1981 Died 31 October 1981_

_The last enemy that shall be destroyed is death_

There they were, Sirius' best friend and his wife; resting forever underneath these stones. Sirius could not stop the tears from coming as he thought of this burial twelve years ago, the one he had not been able to attend. The last time he saw James, he was laying stone cold on the floor. He died protecting Lily and Harry. The last time he saw Lily, she was lifeless on the floor of Harry's nursery. This was the first time he'd been within a foot of his friends, and they weren't even alive. He'd never had a chance to tell them how important they were to him, how sorry he was that he'd convinced them to choose Peter instead, how sorry he was that Harry had to grow up without them; he never even gotten the chance to say goodbye.

It took him a moment, he had to muster up some strength to open his mouth, but eventually, he was able to speak to his friends.

"Hello, Prongs," Sirius said, almost expecting James to answer him. "I'm…I'm sorry that I haven't been here, but I…I really had no choice. I've been in Azkaban for years, Prongs. Who would have thought that all of Lily's predictions of the Marauders' rotting in Azkaban would have come true," he laughed forcibly. "You see I've been in Azkaban for all this time because they…they all thought that I sold out you and Lily. I would have never, Prongs; you were like a brother to me. You and Lily were the closest to a real family I ever had. I loved you both, Prongs, and I never would have given you up. I would have died protecting you both and Harry. Peter, he…he changed to his animagus form, and everyone thought I killed him. I know I didn't Prongs, but I'm telling you I would have. I tried to only a few days ago, but your son stopped me. He's wonderful James, your son. Brilliant. He looks just like you, black hair, glasses, and all, except for his eyes, they're definitely Lily's. He's a magnificent flyer, Prongs! He made seeker for the Gryffindor team his first year. I sent him a broom this year as a gift, a Firebolt. You should see it. It would have been a dream for you to fly. I'm sorry that I haven't been able to be there for him, Prongs. You made me his godfather, and I should have looked after him. Hagrid was there that night, and he was taking Harry on Dumbledore's orders. I knew he'd be safe with him, and I had to find Peter, so I let him go," Sirius heaved a sigh.

"He saved me, Harry did. He saved me from Snivellus in the shrieking shack, and from the dementors. Quite the brave one, your son. Snivellus is teaching now at Hogwarts. I'm sure he's a pleasure for all the students," Sirius laughed to himself. "But this year, Moony's been teaching as well. He's the Defense teacher. No one better for the job of course, Moony was one of the brightest. He taught Harry how to produce a patronus. Brilliant. He's got the map! Harry's got our map. It's how Moony figured out I was at Hogwarts, found Harry with it I suppose. I have no idea how he got it, but we always knew a worthy trouble maker would, didn't we?" He laughed again.

"Listen Prongs," he said becoming somber again. "I…I probably won't be able to make it here much anymore, I'm still on the run, but I…I just wanted to be able to say…to say goodbye. I would have given anything to be, really I would have, that's what I planned, After I dealt with Peter I was going straight to Dumbledore to get Harry, but I ended up in Azkaban. Prongs, you're my best mate. A day hasn't gone by without my thinking of you. I think my memories of our Hogwarts days got me through those years at Azkaban. I'm sorry that I couldn't do more, that I couldn't have saved you. I wish I could have. I wish it could have been me instead. I promise you I'm going to do my best to keep Harry safe doing whatever I can."

Sirius turned his gaze to _Lily Potter _engraved on the stone. "Oh Lily, I can't leave without talking to you," he laid his hand on the stone. "Lily you were so, so wonderful. Beautiful, brilliant, kind, and Harry's just like you. He's been staying with your sister all these years. I know you two didn't talk, and from what I know it hasn't been ideal, but they've kept him safe. He's doing so well in school, Harry is. From what I know he's the best at Defense Against the Dark Arts, no surprise there. He's so kind, Lily, just like you—compassionate to everyone. And he's so brave; he's faced Voldemort twice and defeated him. He's so much like you and James, Lily, so much. He has the best parts of both of you." Sirius sat stilly for a minute. "I wanted to say I'm sorry, Lily. I'm sorry for all the torment we caused you at school, all the pranks we played on you, and trouble we made. You must have forgiven me because you let me be best man your wedding and let me be Harry's godfather," he sat silent again. "You were wonderful Lily, perfect for Prongs. We'd never have admitted it in school, but you were exactly what he needed. I'm sure you know this, but he was so happy with you, Lily. He loved you so much."

Sirius knew he was running out of time. He had to leave soon before someone spotted him. "Well," he said standing up in front of the headstone. "I just came to…see you both, and say I'm sorry for not being there for Harry. I want you both to know that I'm going to do the best I can for him now. Whatever I can do I'm going to do it, no matter what. I love you both," he added. "Prongs you were the best friend I ever had, your family took me in when my own wouldn't. Not a day will go by when I won't miss you, and lovely, Lily," he said. "You really were wonderful in every way. I don't know where the two of you are, but I'm sure it's some place magnificent. You two deserved happiness more than any other people I knew. I'm sure you're watching over Harry from wherever you are, but know that I'll be watching from here too. I've offered him to come live with me, once this is all over, and I'm not on the run anymore," he added. "I promised him we'd be a proper family. I promise I'll take good care of him Lily. He'll have to do his coursework, and I'll keep him out of Azkaban. And I'll make sure he flies all the time, Prongs, get all the practice he needs, and that Remus gives him back the map."

Sirius stared at the headstones again. He'd done what he wanted to do, but he was not ready for the finality that it brought.

"Goodbye, Lily," he said. Holding back the tears that were filling his eyes, Sirius bent over to place his hand over James' name. "Goodbye, Prongs."

With that Sirius turned away from the headstone and left the graveyard. As soon as he was back on the street, he disappeared leaving Godric's Hollow just as still as it had been all evening.


End file.
